Saab Link Forums banner
1 - 14 of 14 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,206 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Guy 1: How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Guy 2: How many?
Guy 1: 8
Guy 2: Why?
Guy 1: Oh, stop overanalyzing it.

Question: How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Answer: Fish.

*Courtesy of Dennis Lehane, in Shutter Island. Stupendous movie, but the book's even better.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
913 Posts
How many Kennedys does it take to screw in a light bulb?
ANS: Three
One to hold the light bulb, and two to drink 'til the room spins.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,384 Posts
Q. How many AFL-CIO members does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Fitty
Q. 50!??
A. Yeah, fuckin' fitty--it's in da contract.


Q. How many computer programmers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. It can't be done--that's a hardware problem.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,403 Posts
Three men were standing side-by-side using the urinal.

The first man finished, zipped up and started washing and literally scrubbing his hands ... clear up to his elbows ... He used about 20 paper towels before he finished. He turned to the other two men and commented: "I graduated from Harvard and they taught us to be clean."

The second man finished, zipped up and quickly wet the tips of his fingers, grabbed one paper towel and commented: "I graduated from the University of California and they taught us to be environmentally conscious."

The third man zipped up and as he was walking out the door, said: "I didn't go to college, but I know not to piss on my hands."
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,837 Posts
Three men were standing side-by-side using the urinal.

The first man finished, zipped up and started washing and literally scrubbing his hands ... clear up to his elbows ... He used about 20 paper towels before he finished. He turned to the other two men and commented: "I graduated from Harvard and they taught us to be clean."

The second man finished, zipped up and quickly wet the tips of his fingers, grabbed one paper towel and commented: "I graduated from the University of California and they taught us to be environmentally conscious."

The third man zipped up and as he was walking out the door, said: "I didn't go to college, but I know not to piss on my hands."
bahaha
 
1 - 14 of 14 Posts
Top