I have no idea.

I hope to not have to know how to use them.

although, it is possible that at any time, people could poop their pants.

 

I wear diapers every day. Not really out of necessity, but because I enjoy the feel.

If anyone else enjoys this, please join my myspace group.

http://groups.myspace.com/diaperedbabies

 

the concept of diapers is disturbing. you wear them to catch whatever's coming out, but then it rubs all over your ass. this is absolutely disgusting. if i ever became incontinent, i don't know how i'd live with myself.

way back in high school ('90s), i used to go to these goth and punk parties in philly at the trocadero. but all these weird S&M people would show up. i guess they thought that they were acceptable at these events but they really weren't. this old dude in his 50s would always be there in a giant diaper wearing a bonnet, and that was all. he carried a paddle. he would go up to chicks and ask them to spank him. then he would crap his diaper. he would harass us all night. it was horrible.

 

way back in high school ('90s), i used to go to these goth and punk parties in philly at the trocadero. but all these weird S&M people would show up. i guess they were acceptable at these events but they really weren't. this old dude in his 50s would always be there in a giant diaper wearing a bonnet, and that was all. he carried a paddle. he would go up to chicks and ask them to spank him. then he would crap his diaper. he would harass us all night. it was horrible.

Wow.

 

you might need them if you take that new weight loss drug "alli"

http://www.poopreport.com/Consumer/alli_side_effects.html

 

What about those Olestra potato chips? :lol: anal leakage ftl.

 

that just reminded me of this from "best of craigslist":

DO NOT EAT PRINGLES FAT FREE POTATO CHIPS. THEY WILL GREASE YOUR ASS.
Date: 2006-07-17, 2:10AM PDT

Don't even fucking say a word. I like potato chips, and can't eat them very much or I'll get fat.

I tried out these Pringles Fat-Free chips because they were super low-cal. BBQ flavor. the fuck.

The can said they had 70 calories per serving, which meant the whole can had 490 calories inside total. I could munch through a can in a day with my lunch, dinner, etc. So I got several cans, and began enjoying one a day for the past four days. But what they dont fucking tell you...

Except in tiny print you cant read without a fucking electron microscope

...is that the primary ingredient is something called "olean" which I have since learned is Latin for "Unwashable & Indestructible Ass Grease."

Oh Yeah. I'm not even kidding.

So today, while I'm standing in the living room debating whether or not Laundry or Dishes will get done first, I get the urge to fart. I live alone, so sweet. I let the honk loose and its wrong. Something just sounded wrong. I know my own wind, and I have never farted a sound that sounded like a fart wrapped in a pillow.

Oh yes, something was very wrong. I had just shat myself. But this evil olean makes shitting yourself sound almost like a regular fart, and had I not been particularly attentive, it could easily have gone unnoticed, I'm telling you. THAT's how utterly covert and evil this olean stuff is. What the fuck?! What if I'd gone out to hang with friends or gone for a drive, what then?

So I walk carefully to the bathroom and disrobe. before I even sit on the toilet, I wad paper and carefully wipe from the front. Sure enough, it was light brown, and had the texture of soft spackle. You fucking Pringle bastards.

I sat down and pushed a bit, and lo, out came a jet that I didnt even feel an urge for one minute earlier. It piled in the bowl like brown marshmallow fluff.

The problem rose when I tried to wipe. I went through a whole fucking roll of TP and could not get it all off me. So.

I jumped in the shower. Yep, its gross, but it had to be done. There I stood, water pouring down, cheeks spread, and using my own hand to make certain I'm clean.

That was when I discovered that after using my hand to wipe myself (before I soaped the area) my hand came back covered in some sort of transparent grease. It was so fucking foul. The grease made water bead off my hand. It was tacky too, and very difficult to manage.

So I grabbed the bar of saop and went to work.

You fucking Pringle bastards.

The bar of soap came away coated in grease as well, and would no longer wash. I had to turn the water to hot and massage the soap for five minutes to get it to the point where I could use it again. It took me an hour to get the fucking grease off my pucker. I shudder to think of what its doing INSIDE ME right now, but I will damned sure never eat that shit again.

Fucking Pringle bastards.

This is where the joke about "anal leakage" came from. its real. Fuck Pringles.

--

in other news, my coworker liked my present. i gave it to him with a bow on top. he shared color photos of his colon with me while i ate lunch. i was not amused, especially as his colon looks like squid and i was eating seafood stir fry.

he's going to wear them at a party this weekend.

--

abdukted, why do you read the poop report??

 

There should be an Alli challenge. Take the highest safe dose of Alli and then eat 5 Wendy's Triple Bacon Cheesburgers and whoever craps themself last wins. Winner gets some $$$.

 

The only way to win is not to play.

(name the movie that line is from !)

 

Then after, we could do the ol' "chug a gallon of milk in an hour contest"

 

I have an older friend (he's in his late 40's) that wears Depends to Jimmy Buffet concerts. He doesn't want to miss any of the concert, so he just uses the Depenends instead of waiting in long lines to use the washroom.

 

oh shit!

 

 

LMAO!!! I love the idea of an Alli challenge, it made me LOL.

My doctor put me on Alli, cause I'm lazy and don't really have the time and desire to do a rigorous diet/exercise program.
The first time I ate greasy chinese food... holy hell

On the bright side, I've lost 12lbs in a month. thats eating better and cutting out soda. I completely cut out fast food.

 

My doctor put me on Alli, cause I'm lazy and don't really have the time and desire to do a rigorous diet/exercise program.
The first time I ate greasy chinese food... holy hell

On the bright side, I've lost 12lbs in a month. thats eating better and cutting out soda. I completely cut out fast food.

I lost 12lbs in a month by eating better and cutting out junk food. Orlistat et al work by making you THINK that you're doing better, diet-wise. All that they really do is bind to fat molecules and prevent them from being absorbed, but any doctor will tell you it's unburned calories that turns into visceral and body fat. It's mind over matter. I bet if you stopped taking the Alli, you'd lose another 12lbs just sticking to the plan book.

 

i did a google search for "poop your pants" and that article on alli I posted came up near the top.... good stuff